Friday, March 12, 2010

Alive and Sort Of Well

Rest assured; I haven’t fallen off the face of the earth. I’m alive – and sort of well. My excuse for silence in the blogosphere is a broken wrist. The immobility has affected my day-to-day life (not to mention my ego) more than I thought it would. Have you ever tried shaving your left armpit with the razor in your left hand? It’s no picnic. Or starting your car left-handed? Think about it: You have to reach up and under the steering wheel and across your body just to get the engine roaring. Hair-straightening is also a drag. And don’t even get me started on typing. (I’ve been hunting and pecking for fifteen minutes already.) My texting has been extra slow lately; often I dream up wildly brilliant and witty messages to send specific folks on my contact list, but I can’t muster the energy to pound them out one-handed. (I’m going on twenty-five minutes.)

The temporary splint that my twerp of an orthopedic surgeon gave me – after he re-broke my hand to "set" it – is becoming quite loose. I’m not sure whether this is a good or bad thing. (Bad because the splint is no longer providing the support I need? Good because the swelling has gone down? Bad because I’m losing all muscle in my forearm, which now looks like it belongs to an eight-year-old child?) Regardless, I’m getting a real cast on Monday at 8:20 a.m. Doctor Twerp says it may have to go up and around my elbow, even though he originally assured me I’d have full arm-bending abilities. On Monday, if in fact he suggests elbow immobility, I’m taking my business elsewhere.

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  1. Ok- Its really time for a new post...I mean that. now. please. ok. seriously. alright. thanks.